Defining Food Allergies
From AllergyKids.com

Today, it is estimated that 20% of American children have allergies.

In the last twenty years, we have seen an epidemic increase in allergies, asthma, ADHD and autism, including a:

400% increase in food allergies

300% increase in asthma, with a 56% increase in asthma deaths

400% increase in ADHD

and between a 1,500 and 6,000% increase in autism.

The male/female ratio for food allergies is 2:1 and the male/female ratio for asthma is 3:1.

Any food can cause an allergic reaction, but 90% of all food allergies are caused by one of the following: wheat, eggs, milk, peanuts, tree nuts, soy, fish and shell fish.

Industry funded organizations cite data from 2002, stating that the FDA estimates 2 percent of adults and up to 8 percent of young children suffer from food allergies.

According to this five year old data, at least 1 out of every 17 children under the age of three has a food allergy, about 30,000 people require emergency room treatment for food allergies and an estimated 150 die.

If you walk into a preschool classroom anywhere in America, the number of students with food allergies tells a much different story, suggesting that these statistics are underestimated and that the problem is far more pervasive than industry groups would have you believe.

Even more striking is the fact that asthma, another allergic reaction, accounts for almost 5,000 deaths a year, while at the same time, there has been an increase in the number of people with Celiac's Disease (a wheat allergy).

Food allergy symptoms can range from mild to life threatening and may include:

hives

itching

swelling of the face, lips, tongue and/or eyes

diarrhea

vomiting

cramps

itching and tightness of throat

difficulty breathing

wheezing

in extreme cases, anaphylactic shock.

Anaphylactic shock is a severe allergic reaction that often includes swelling of the face, lips, mouth and throat and it can lead to a drop in blood pressure, shock and unconsciousness. If not treated immediately with epinephrine, anaphylaxis can be fatal.

Some children may outgrow their food allergy, although increasing evidence suggests that this autoimmune disease may take a progressive nature resulting in additional food allergies, asthma and other related conditions.

As novel proteins and toxins have been introduced into our food and vaccine supplies in the last ten years, these chemicals appear to create a toxic overload in our children, impacting their immune systems, nervous systems and gastrointestinal systems (in which 70% of our immune systems are found).

Allergies can also involve inflammation in the lungs (asthma) and brain (ADHD).

For more information on Food Allegies and a Support Community, visit
Families With Food Allergies: www.FWFA.net

Food Allergy Basics:
What You Need To Know To Keep Your Kids Safe
From Kid's Health

When Marcy prepared a peanut butter and jelly sandwich for her son Ben's lunch that morning, she did it because they were running late for day care and it was the quickest thing she could put together. But shortly after Ben began eating his lunch, his child-care provider noticed he seemed to be trying to scratch an itch in his mouth. After he vomited and began wheezing, the care provider sought medical treatment for Ben, who was later diagnosed with a food allergy, in this case to peanuts.

Along with milk, eggs, wheat, soy, and shellfish, peanuts are among the most common foods that cause allergies. For some kids, food allergies can cause only minor discomfort, like a little tingling in the mouth. But for others they can be severe, causing difficulty breathing, for example.

Learning how to recognize an allergic reaction will help you get your child the medical care needed if a reaction occurs. If your child has already been diagnosed with a food allergy, it's important to know:

how to accommodate your child's dietary needs

what emergency preparations to make in case your child has an allergic reaction

What Is a Food Allergy?

With a food allergy, the body reacts as though that particular food product is harmful. As a result, the body's immune system (which fights infection and disease) creates antibodies to fight the food allergen, the substance in the food that triggers the allergy. The next time a person comes in contact with that food by touching or eating it or inhaling its particles, the body releases chemicals, including one called histamine, to "protect" itself. These chemicals trigger allergic symptoms that can affect the respiratory system, gastrointestinal tract, skin, or cardiovascular system. These symptoms might include a runny nose, an itchy skin rash, a tingling in the tongue, lips, or throat, swelling, abdominal pain, or wheezing.

People often confuse food allergies with food intolerance because of similar symptoms.

Food intolerance:

• doesn't involve the immune system
• can be caused by a person's inability to digest certain substances, such as lactose
• can be unpleasant but is rarely dangerous

The symptoms of food intolerance can include burping, indigestion, flatulence, loose stools, headaches, flushing, or nervousness. A person with food intolerance can usually eat small amounts of the particular food without having any symptoms.

According to the U.S. Food and Drug Administration (FDA), up to 6% of children in the United States under age 3 have food allergies. They are less common in adults but, overall, food allergies affect nearly 4 million people.

Doctors can't predict which kids will have food allergies and which kids won't, but some factors may place a child at higher risk for developing food allergies. The tendency to become allergic in general is inherited. Many kids with food allergies come from families whose members have a history of other allergies.

Certain other health conditions are associated with severe allergic reactions to foods. For example, people with asthma are at greater risk for developing severe reactions from food allergies.

There's nothing you can do to completely eliminate the possibility that your child will develop food allergies. However, breastfeeding (especially exclusive breastfeeding that is not supplemented with infant formula) can help infants who are especially prone to milk or soy allergies avoid allergic reactions. When an infant consumes only breast milk, he or she has a decreased exposure to foods that can cause allergies. Some doctors also recommend that allergy-prone babies not be fed solid foods until 6 months of age or later to avoid exposure to allergenic foods.

Some Common Food Allergens

A child could be allergic to any food, but there are eight common allergens that account for 90% of all reactions in children:

• milk
• eggs
• peanuts
• tree nuts (such as walnuts and cashews)
• fish
• shellfish (such as shrimp)
• soy
• wheat

In general, most common food allergies are outgrown in childhood. Of kids who are allergic to milk, eggs, wheat, and soy, 55% of them outgrow those allergies by the time they are 3 years old. When it comes to nuts and seafood, 25% of kids with those allergies outgrow them by the time they are 3 years old.

Because allergens affect multiple parts of the body, an allergic child may experience a wide variety of symptoms within a few minutes or up to 2 hours after coming into contact with the food. Typically the first symptom is itching; other symptoms involve a rash, gastrointestinal symptoms, nausea, diarrhea, respiratory symptoms, and swelling.

A common skin symptom of a food allergy is hives, or raised red itchy bumps on the skin. Swelling of the face, throat, lips, and tongue also may occur, often within minutes of contact with the food. Respiratory symptoms such as wheezing and trouble breathing or gastrointestinal symptoms such as sudden abdominal pain and vomiting also are common reactions.

When a child has a serious allergic reaction with widespread effects on the body, this condition is known as anaphylaxis. A child with anaphylaxis, which can involve the heart, lungs, blood vessels, and other body systems, may:

• feel dizzy or lightheaded
• lose consciousness
• have a rapid heart rate
• have difficulty breathing because of a swelling in the throat and airways
• have a life-threatening drop in blood pressure (also known as anaphylactic shock)

Without rapid emergency medical treatment, children with anaphylaxis can die if they are unable to breathe or if they collapse due to shock.

Medications that increase the heart rate and blood pressure, such as epinephrine, are often needed to control any kind of severe allergic reaction.

Diagnosing a Food Allergy

you suspect your child may have a food allergy, it's a good idea to contact your child's doctor or an allergy specialist. The doctor will take your child's medical history and ask questions about specific symptoms and your child's diet. To help identify specific allergens, the doctor may ask you to keep a food diary for your child with details on what foods are eaten and when symptoms occur.

Before diagnosing your child with a food allergy, the doctor will look for any other conditions that could be causing symptoms. For example, if your child seems to have diarrhea after drinking milk, the doctor may check to see if lactose intolerance could be causing this instead of a food allergy. In rare cases, a child is sensitive to dyes or food additives such as yellow #5 or monosodium glutamate (or MSG, a flavor enhancer commonly used in Asian and other foods), which can cause symptoms similar to those of a food allergy.

Another condition that may mimic food allergy symptoms is celiac disease, in which the child is not able to tolerate gluten, a protein found in wheat and certain other grains. Occasionally, a reaction can be caused by eating cheese, wine, or fish with high levels of histamine, a chemical occurring naturally in the body that in larger amounts may cause symptoms such as hives and rashes.

may recommend an elimination diet to help diagnose and identify a food allergy. During an elimination diet, a child avoids eating any food that is suspected of causing an allergy and the doctor follows the results to see if allergy symptoms disappear. If they do, the food will then be reintroduced to see if the child's symptoms reappear.

also may be done to diagnose a food allergy. This procedure is usually performed in the doctor's office. The doctor will prick or scratch the child's skin with a plastic or metal prong with a small amount of allergen on it, placing the suspected allergic substance on the skin. If the child develops an itchy bump surrounded by redness (also called a wheal) within 15 minutes of the skin prick, the child is considered allergic to that substance.

For children who have extremely severe allergic reactions or other skin conditions such as eczema, the skin test may cause irritation or other more serious reactions. Your child's doctor may also do blood tests that check for antibodies for specific allergens.

Treating a Food Allergy

After diagnosing your child with a food allergy, the doctor will help you create a treatment plan. No medication can cure food allergies, so treatment usually means avoiding the allergen and all the foods that contain it.

Often, allergists will instruct parents to completely restrict the allergen from the child's diet. But it can be difficult to eliminate the offending food and maintain an otherwise nutritious, balanced diet, so it may be helpful to consult a registered dietitian about your child's diet.

Your child also may be advised to avoid foods containing similar allergens because they could cause a reaction as well. For example, a child who experiences hives and wheezing after eating shrimp probably will be told to avoid other shellfish such as lobster and crab. Your child's doctor should provide you with information about foods to avoid, ingredients to be careful of, and support groups for parents of children with food allergies.

Although there's no cure for food allergies, medications can treat both minor and severe symptoms. Antihistamines may be used to treat symptoms such as hives, runny nose, and abdominal pain associated with an allergic reaction. If your child wheezes or has asthma flares (also called attacks) as the result of a food allergy, the doctor will likely recommend that a bronchodilator such as albuterol (which can be inhaled from a handheld pump device) be taken right away to reduce breathing difficulties. But remember: If your child experiences an allergy-triggered breathing problem, it's important to seek emergency medical treatment immediately, even if your child has been given breathing medications at home or school to treat the reaction.

Epinephrine is often used to treat severe allergic reactions. If your child has severe food allergies, it's a good idea to have epinephrine within easy reach for quick use at all times. This may mean keeping epinephrine in your home, car, briefcase or purse, and also at relatives' homes, and your child's day care or school.

Signs and symptoms of a severe allergic reaction include:

• feeling of warmth, flushing, or tickling in the mouth
• red, itchy rash
• hives
• feeling of lightheadedness
• shortness of breath
• wheezing
• severe sneezing
• anxiety
• cramps in the stomach or uterus
• vomiting or diarrhea

If your child has a food allergy reaction severe enough to cause wheezing, you should seek emergency care immediately instead of using an inhaler to treat the wheezing. As soon as you recognize that your child is having a severe reaction, call 911 and explain your child's condition. Quick treatment can mean the difference between life and death for children with the most severe food allergies.

Feeding Your Child With Food Allergies

Feeding a child with food allergies can be challenging. You'll need to familiarize yourself with food labels and ingredients lists so you can avoid your child's particular allergen. Below are a few suggestions of what to watch out for.

If your child is allergic to:

Milk: Avoid cheeses, butter, creams, and yogurt. Also avoid lactose-free milk as well as foods with ingredients such as casein and whey.

Eggs: Avoid cakes, cookies, pastries, mayonnaise, and egg substitutes. Also avoid foods that contain ovalbumin, often abbreviated as Ov. Some fresh pastas and soups may also be prepared with eggs. In addition, the doctor may advise against a flu shot for a child with an egg allergy because the flu vaccine contains small amounts of egg protein.

Soy: Avoid soybeans, soy nut butter, soy sauce, soy protein, soy oil, and tofu. Also avoid any food with lecithin in the ingredients list.

Peanuts: Avoid any food that contains nuts, as well as peanut flour or peanut oil. You will also want to prevent your child from eating Asian foods (which are often cooked in peanut oil), egg rolls, chocolate, candy bars, and any pastries that may contain nuts. If a food's ingredients include hydrolyzed plant or vegetable protein, avoid it because it may contain peanuts. Although peanuts and tree nuts are two different foods and are not actually related, children who have peanut allergies are advised to avoid tree nuts (and vice versa) because about 30% react to both allergens.

Tree nuts: Avoid almonds, Brazil nuts, walnuts, pecans, cashews, and macadamia nuts. You'll also want to keep your child away from nut butters or any product that mentions nuts in the ingredients list, including ice cream or crackers, unless you know them to be nut-free.

Shellfish: Avoid crab, lobster, shrimp, snails, clams, and oysters, as well as other types of shellfish. Children who are allergic to shellfish may be able to tolerate fish that swim, such as flounder or cod, but testing may be needed to determine any sensitivity to those foods. Alternatively, children who are allergic to fish that swim may tolerate shellfish. Marinara sauce, Worcestershire sauce, salad dressings, and hot dogs and deli meats may also contain fish or shellfish ingredients.

In general, if your child has severe food allergies, it's a good idea to be cautious about allowing your child to eat processed foods. If you cook with whole-food ingredients and bake from scratch, you'll greatly decrease your child's risk of exposure to an allergen.

And just because your child has a food allergy doesn't mean that favorite kid foods have to be out of reach. Many of your favorite family recipes can be easily modified to fit your child's special needs. For example, in recipes calling for milk, substitute equal amounts of juice or water to preserve consistency. If your child has an egg allergy, you can substitute a mixture of 1 teaspoon (5 milliliters) of baking powder, 1 tablespoon (15 milliliters) of water or milk, and 1 tablespoon (15 milliliters) of vinegar for each egg. For more information about food substitutions and allergen-free recipes, look to food allergy organizations such as the Food Allergy & Anaphylaxis Network (access their website by clicking the Additional Resources tab), which publishes cookbooks and recipes for parents of children with food allergies.

Beginning in 2006, packaged foods that contain some of the most common allergens must be clearly labeled. Food makers are required to clearly state, in or adjacent to the list of ingredients, whether the product contains milk, eggs, fish, shellfish, tree nuts, peanuts, wheat, or soybeans. This new law only applies to foods labeled after the start of 2006, so there may still be products on the grocery store shelves that were packaged before then, which don't have information about allergens.

Even so, eating packaged foods or dining in schools or restaurants could bring your child into contact with hidden sources of the allergen. Even if a food does not initially contain the allergenic food as an ingredient, your child could be exposed to it due to cross-contamination. In cross-contamination, a pan, utensil, dish, or surface used to prepare an allergenic food could contaminate a food that wouldn't normally cause a reaction. For example, cheeses and deli meats might be cut with the same slicer, which could be dangerous for a child with a milk allergy who orders a cheese-free sandwich.

Planning is key to helping your child enjoy meals and snacks and avoid allergic reactions. In general, it's safer to pack your child's food yourself than to rely on restaurants. If you do visit a restaurant with your child, it's important to ask detailed questions about the preparation techniques and ingredients used to make the food. And consider choosing simply prepared menu items such as cuts of meat, steamed vegetables, or baked potatoes instead of complicated dishes that contain many ingredients.

Traveling with a child who has food allergies can be challenging, but many hotels and airlines offer options to make it a little easier. When making reservations with an airline, it's a good idea to tell the representative that your child has food allergies. With prior notice, some airlines will avoid serving peanut snacks during the flight and most will serve your child allergen-free meals. To ensure your child's safety, confirm your child's special meal before boarding the plane and ask the flight attendants how the food is prepared so you're sure there's no chance of cross-contamination. At your destination, consider staying in a hotel or motel offering small refrigerators or hot plates that will allow you to prepare meals in your room.

Although packing your child's lunch will avoid cross-contamination and ensure that your child eats only allergen-free foods, you also may be able to work with your child's school cafeteria to manage your child's allergy. Talk to the school's nutritionist for detailed information about the ingredients in breakfast or lunch menus, and discuss food preparation practices to determine if cross-contamination could take place. Some schools even provide peanut-free tables or rooms for children with severe peanut allergies. It's important to be open with teachers and school administrators about your child's allergy so they can help keep your child safe.

Other Tips for Avoiding Reactions

The key to successful management of your child's food allergy is being prepared. Depending on the severity of the allergy, your child's doctor may recommend that your child carry prescription medication, such as epinephrine, in case of a severe allergic reaction. You may also be instructed to keep antihistamines close at hand to treat your child in case of an emergency.

Unfortunately, mistakes can happen even when you and your child are being careful. Because of the potential severity of allergic reactions to food, your child should wear a medical alert bracelet or necklace with the allergic condition inscribed on it. In an emergency, medical personnel or doctors will know that your child has a food allergy.

Try to work with your child's school or child-care center to find ways your child can be supervised to prevent contact with allergenic foods. Find out who would give your child treatment and discuss your child's allergies with that person, making sure that they have any necessary medications.

Although breastfeeding is one way to delay a child's exposure to allergens, certain allergens from foods in a mother's diet can be passed through breast milk and cause a reaction in an infant. If your family has a history of food allergies and you are breastfeeding your child, discuss your situation with an allergy specialist or your child's doctor. The doctor may recommend that you eliminate major allergenic foods such as dairy products, eggs, peanuts and tree nuts, fish and shellfish, and soy from your own diet.

If you must eliminate a major component of your diet - such as dairy products - consider consulting a registered dietitian to ensure that your diet is balanced and provides enough calories for good health while you're nursing.

A final crucial step in protecting your child is stressing the importance of healthy habits. Teach your child to never share or trade food at school or at a friend's house. If the allergy isn't outgrown, you'll need to teach your child how to read food labels and ingredients lists and to ask how food is prepared when eating away from home.

Article © 2005 from:
Updated and reviewed by: William J. Geimeier, MD
Date reviewed: July 2005
Reviewed by: Stephen McGeady, MD

For more information and support, visit
Families With Food Allergies: www.FWFA.net

CREATE A LEARNING HOME
By "Coffee Queen" from Hub Pages

Parents and often struggle with how best to have preschoolers spend their free time. Research has long found that home environment can make a huge difference in kids' cognitive and other abilities. And summer, particularly for toddlers and preschoolers, is the time that parents (and grandparents) have with children that can really help kids grow emotionally, behaviorally and academically while also having a ton of fun!

Below is a research-based list of recommendations for creating an educational environment for a toddler and preschool age child during the summer months.

Every day, parents/grandparents should:

1. Create opportunities for imaginative play. Some form of daily "pretend play" improves emotional/behavioral skills. And emotional/behavioral skills predict academic performance later in life. A couple of suggestions of how to create an environment that support imaginative play might include:

Fill a costume chest with dress up clothes and old kids Halloween costumes. You can get great deals on EBay for all sorts of kids' costumes!

Play the Magic Elevator. Spread a towel on the ground for your 'elevator.' Step in and push the pretend button to travel to different floors. Describe each step: 'The door is opening' (show with your hands). 'We're getting on the elevator' (step on the towel). 'We're pushing two' (push button). 'We're going up' (look up), etc. Get off at different floors and describe what you see at each one. Visit the whispering floor, the jumping/ flying floor, the eating ice cream floor, the walking backwards floor, the tiger floor, etc.

Restock your arts supply kits with scissors, markers, crayons, pens, paints and lots and lots of paper. There are tons of activities that go beyond just drawing that really helps kids stimulate their imagination and abstract thinking skills. Here are just a couple:

Rock Family - Collect enough rocks to represent each member of your family. Paint the rocks either to look like each person. Place your new Rock Family in your garden or near the front door

Life-Size Paper Doll - Take a long piece of butcher paper and have your child lie down on top of it (his or her entire body needs to fit within the edges with a good margin around the sides). Trace around your child's body with a Sharpie. When your child stands up, you will have an outline that you and your child can dress and decorate however you wish.

Have on hand some form of building blocks. Wedgits are great for any age - very young toddlers can mix and match shapes and colors. Regular old building blocks and legos are, of course, classics and instrumental in helping kids put their imagination to work. For older preschool age children, the Quadrilla Basic Set is an elegantly simple wooden block set that allows kids to create magnificent marble runs and understand elemental physics!

2. Include physical play. Some sort of physical play helping children develop gross (ball throwing, bike riding) and fine (handwriting) motor skills matters too. There is a direct correlation between the gross motor skill development of a preschooler and long term health. Summer is wonderful since it just charms all of us outdoors. In addition to splashing in a pool, running on a beach, tumbling on a lawn and all the other great joys of summer there are some activities you can do with your preschooler that help them develop both those gross motor skills and fine motor skills on rainy days.

Make an obstacle course. For gross motor skills, creating an obstacle course within your own living room with arrows using masking tape - of chairs to climb over, tables to climb under, pillows, couch cushions, boxes, step stools, hula hoops (if you have them) - and using different movements - crawling, walking, climbing, walking backwards, tiptoeing - on a rainy day is an excellent way for children to learn how their bodies move though space and a sense of balance.

Bead necklaces. Beading necklaces is wonderful for eye hand coordination (for younger toddlers be sure to put a piece of tape around the end of the string to make it easier to bead!)

Play Operation. Playing the game Operation is terrific for helping kids master the precision and strength needed someday to write letters. And when this fun game prompts you to clarify for your little one that he doesn't in fact have a wishbone down near his belly button, then you've just found yourself an early biology tool too!

3. Integrate the ABCs and 123s into daily activity. We know focus on cognitive areas such as ABCs and 123s matters enormously. For example, how well a child reads at the end of first grade predicts how well they read in later grades, graduation rates and even their income level as an adult. There are so many very simple ways that parents can reinforce those basic literacy and numeric concepts at home.

Count and count again. Research shows that toddlers internalize counting when this is closely integrated with daily living. So if your toddler is helping you cook, count the number of times you each are stirring and then hand off the wooden spoon "1,2,3,4,5 stirs; now it is your turn". When half the family is sitting at the dinner table, talk about joining the other three people pointing at each one "1,2,3 and you make 4" when your child sits down. You will be amazed at how quickly your toddler picks up this behavior and starts counting on his/her own!

Sprinkle your home with visual toys and cues - such as alphabet wall art, puzzles, blocks, tracing paper - for your child to just pick up and play with at will. The more they interact with the ABCs and 123s, and there are some wonderful tools to help them do so, the more quickly they will pick up these building blocks to later academic success. Some of our favorites are eeBoo wall art, Leap Frog's ABC bus and Melissa and Doug's ABC and number puzzles.

Plan ABC and 123 Activities. Make time to do fun, creative activities that reinforce the ABCs and 123s. There are dozens of ways to do that. Here are a couple of our favorites;

- Create your own ABC book. Start by cutting even size paper that will make up the pages of the book. Over the course of a week or so, create the pages in the book. Start with 'A', write a capital 'A' and a lowercase 'a'. Talk about an item (that you can draw - like apple) that starts with an 'A'. Draw the item next to the letters. Talk about the item and the letter, if you can find it in your house, find the object. Make it something special that your child can look forward to doing every day. Get stickers (with letters and objects if you can) and have your child decorate the pages with stickers and crayons. Do a letter or two a day. At the end of the alphabet, punch holes on the side of the paper and put ribbon through the holes to make a book that your child can keep.

- Set up a room in your house like a grocery store. Put some of your kids' favorite foods on tables and other low pieces of furniture -- these will make the aisles of the grocery store. Then give your kids something to use as a basket. Then give the kids some money -- real or pretend -- to use to 'buy' their food. Not only is this activity fun, but you can use it to teach young children colors, shapes, counting, and food names. Older children can learn about making a recipe, finding food from all the food groups, and addition and subtraction. And, who knows, the next trip to the grocery store might be a little more fun for them!

LEARNING DISABILITIES IN CHILDREN
By Katie Moseff - from Hub Pages

What can you do for your child?

No one truly enjoys conflict. When that conflict centers around our children, it is particularly uncomfortable. Parents of learning disabled children may feel especially vulnerable when conflicts come up at school through the teacher, administration, or other students. Not only do parents want to protect their child, they also want to maintain the school as a safe and positive environment for their child-conflict may seem to threaten that security.

You may find that your child has been labeled ADD or ADHD. This would truly show itself at home as well as in school.

In school they sometimes label normal students as learning disabled. Sometimes that student may just have a problem with behavior. Teachers have problems dealing with bad students, so they want to judge them and place them in a special class with (LD) classification. This in turn hurts the student because they are now placed in remedial classes with students that are behind because they have behavioral problems. This will put the student behind while creating that mental theory of them not being able to learn. In truth they can learn, but because of behavior problems, and over crowding classes causes people or teachers to misrepresent students with this classification.

Unfortunately, because of their close emotional attachment to the child, parents were often seen by the professionals to be less than helpful to the process and consequently, even their legitimate concerns were essentially ignored by professionals.

If you feel that you child is not learning because of behavior problems and not learning problems. The government has in place a testing system that can judge the grade level of the student. The government also has implanted IQ test for grade school children. These kind of test can tell whether the child is developmentally delayed, have learning problems, or just a bad student in the classroom. The school normally gives the texts every so often but a parent can request that the school test their child with an IQ test before labeling them as a child that has (LD).

It is important for parents of labeled children to remember that "normal" children also have conflicts at school. Sometimes conflict may come up as the school year gets started, while your child is adjusting to the new routine and the teacher is getting to know all of the children. Be sure to keep a folder or file box with all of your child's learning plans, progress notes, past report cards, doctor's reports, and anything else related to academics or the learning disability. If you are called for a visit due to a problem, it is good to have this file handy so you can share information the teacher may need to meet your child's unique needs.

The school will need to provide basic services for your child as outlined in the legal document, the IEP or the Individual Education Plan. This plan is a legal document and does bind the school to deliver needed services as outlined in the plan, it is created after careful testing and consultation with professionals and educators. Keep your copy handy for any problems that may arise.

If the problem is related to something your child did or said, make sure you do hold your child accountable. Children with learning disabilities who are placed in a public school do best when parents expect good behavior from them. Explain to your child what they did, talk about the effects this behavior had on others, and be clear with consequences. Get a good reading on whether your child understood the rules or whether they were not clear for them.

One of the most common conflict parents with a disabled child face center around the education plan (IEP.) When these conflicts arise in the classroom or in the school it is important to meet them head on-remaining firm, clear, and calm about the services your child needs, referring to the plan that was agreed to, and continuing to expect the school or teacher to make the agreed accommodations. There are multiple channels you can follow if the expectations of the education plan are not met. It is important that you remain very involved in your child's education when an IEP is in place, sometimes certain provisions of the IEP are not followed, and the consequences to your child's learning can be profound.

Again, remain involved, urge on behalf of your child, and hold your child accountable for problems they can control.

FEAR OF MONSTERS
By Jonathan H. Gerard, PhD

Taking Aim At Night-Time Fears

It is a common phenomenon of childhood to develop a fear of monsters for a brief period of time, usually between the ages of three and eight—inevitably at bedtime. Parents need to be careful, when responding to this fear, not, inadvertently, to reinforce it. As we think about a solution to this “problem” we want to be careful not to create an even greater problem.

This means that you should not seek to ameliorate a child’s fears by doing anything that will encourage that fear. For example:

1. Do not tell a child that, if he or she is afraid of a monster, he or she may delay bedtime and come sit with you, the parent, for a while. This will just teach a child how to get to stay up later with you—without helping to reduce his or her fear.
   
   
2. Do not sit with your child in her bedroom, keeping her company until she falls asleep. Over time, you’ll find yourself a prisoner of her bedroom.
3. Do not let your child sleep in your bedroom. That, too, will become a problem that outlives the “monster.”

Also, do not deny your child’s “reality” by denying the existence of monsters. You won’t convince him and in the process you’ll only make yourself seem ignorant and irrelevant in his eyes. But at the same time, do not openly lie to your child, confirming a belief in monsters that you do not share.

We have found these two solutions to be of value—the first for younger children, the second for older. Try them in this order. With luck and pluck, you won’t even need the second one—so you can hold it in reserve in case a fear of monsters returns.

FOR THE YOUNGER CHILD
1. With a gleam in your eye and a smile on your face, tell your child that she has nothing to fear. You have a can of “Monster Spray” that your mother (father) used when you were her age. Say, “Wait here while I get it.” (Only adults will note the irony of the command “wait here”. What else would a child in bed do?)

Then get a spray bottle with some water in it or a plant water mister or some such. Wait 5-10 minutes before returning. Bring the can or bottle into your child’s room. If she is asleep (this often happens while she’s safely waiting for your return) save the solution for the next time she complains and proceed as follows. If she’s still awake, do this now:

Say, “This Monster Spray ‘repels’ all monsters. They can't get past it. I’m going to spray the windows and doors with it so that they cannot come into your room. But I have to tell you, It only works for three days. Remind me to spray again in three days.”

Then spray the entire outline of every window and doorway into the room. Remember to spray a line across the the bottom of the doorway and both around the closet and under the bed! Spray lightly, though thoroughly so your child can see the spray being applied. (Obviosuly, don't spray anything that will be toxic to your child. Do not use a cleaning spray as these usually contain harmful chemicals.)

Your child will now feel safe and affirmed and fall asleep. Note that the gleam and smile we mentioned at the start are important. In her fear your child may not notice this body language and will, instead, respond to your verbal cues and real actions. But with hindsight, once the fear is outgrown, your child will recall your affect and come to understand this response of yours as making a fun game of a problem while totally detoxifying it. In this way you will not risk losing the trust of your child.

Also note that the point is to allay the fear without inviting it back. Let your child remind you when it's time to spray again - don't bring up the subject unless she brings it to you.

A SECOND SOLUTION for older children or to use if the first one fails—is this: After you tuck your child into bed, tell him that you, too, worried about monsters when you "lived in _________" (make it a different place than where you live now so that it seems as far away as possible). Give him the bottle of Monster-Spray (or a water-pistol filled with monster-spray) and explain that "this enabled me to sleep safely. No monster ever made it out of my house alive."

Your child will soon fall asleep, quickly loosing his grip from the monster “weapon”, knowing he now has some control over his fear. Leave the weapon in his room for as long as he needs it. Do not remind him of it or initiate a discussion of monsters.

Do not remind him of his fears. Do not risk embarrassing him of a fear that may only recently have been real, but which now is outgrown. Never take credit for helping your child overcome his or her fear. This diminishes self-esteem. It is your child who found a way through the fear. If he or she brings it up at some point in the future, praise his ability to overcome it relatively quickly. Normalize it by pointing out that all children have a fear of monsters “when they are young.”

You can spend a lot of energy trying to figure out why your child suddenly developed a fear of monsters. We recommend you spend your energy on more personally useful tasks. It does not matter what the origin of the fear is, so long as you can help your child overcome it without raising your own anxiety level and without replacing the problem with a greater one. The tools we recommend (spray, golf club) are the implements by which your child will overcome his fear by himself.

© 2007 The Sitter Cafe LLC - Childcare Solutions – All Rights Reserved

FALLING OUT OF BED
By Jonathan H. Gerard, PhD

It is not unusual for children to fall out of bed at night. (It is not unusual for grownups to fall out of bed at night but this is not a column of sex advice.) The problem for your child inevitably comes during those first few nights or weeks when you have transferred him from the safety of a crib to the initially more dangerous environment of a bed.

Here’s what many parents do to try to prevent their children from falling out of bed: They say, “Don’t fall out of bed.”

At first blush this seems like pretty good advice. Why, then, do so many children decline to take it? It has nothing to do with bad memory or rebelliousness or inexperience in a bed or even with a disinclination to take advice. (This latter comes only with increasing adulthood.)

The reason that children do not seem to listen to your heartfelt and useful advice has to do with the way you say it. First of all, you are telling your child to remember something. Remembering is a mental activity that is hard to do during the day and that one rarely does in one’s sleep. Secondly, you are asking your child to remember NOT to do something. This amounts to a second order abstraction that may seem easy but is really hard—for adults as well as for children.

It is rarely good advice to tell someone to remember not to do something. Remember not to burn the toast. Remember not to let the toilet paper run out. Remember not to overdraw your checking account.

Do not tell your child to do any of these things. Here is what you should say, in order for you to help your child remain safely on the bed all night: “Remember to sleep against the wall.”

© 2007 The Sitter Cafe LLC - Childcare Solutions – All Rights Reserved